Title: the creepypasta.
Once there was a boy named deni’s he went to bed right after dinner until he heard something coming from under his bed the monster got deni’s leg and tried to pool his leg so he can go and call the police but the monster broke the while so he woke his sister up and then they woke their mum up she looked under the bed and mum so the monster they all ran to the car and went to the policestaysing
The police went to deni’s house to get the monster and so the monster
The monster never came back but their was a scary girl on deni’s bed
but the door was locked she woke mum up the pool and they pool and the door opened the house was scary they went to bot a new house but deni’s didn’t like his new house he saw someone in the house on his first night he saw someone holding a nafi he broke my door and i saw him go into my sister’s room she scared i help her deni’s and his sister went down stairs to mum room the kid’s ran out of the house and went in the car and mum came and drove away
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ReplyDeleteHi Amo,When i was reading your story i lost my breath because you never put any full stops or capital letter's for a name like Deni also you don't put The end at the end of your story.
ReplyDeleteHi Amo,When i was reading your story i lost my breath because you never put any full stops or capital letter's for a name like Deni also you don't put The end at the end of your story.
ReplyDeleteKia ora Amo,
ReplyDeleteGreat to see your writing on your blog. You have lots of imagination! It was a good idea to go to the police. I'm not sure what the title means. Perhaps think about a title that is more about the writing.
Maria
Kia ora Amo,
ReplyDeleteGreat to see your writing on your blog. You have lots of imagination! It was a good idea to go to the police. I'm not sure what the title means. Perhaps think about a title that is more about the writing. From Kaleb S at Grey Main School.
nice work amo I love you story but mabe you can chang the font
ReplyDeleteHi Amo I really liked your story and enjoyed reading it. I also liked how you put in more scary stuff and making it more interesting to make it like a hook.
ReplyDeleteBut maybe next time you should re read it,share with a partner,check you spelling and put your punctuations in the right place and capital letters.
What did the monster look like
Hello Abraham this is Will here from Grey Main School. This was very interesting. Next time you could use capital letters. This reminds me of when I did "Monster writing" in room 1. Keep up the good work Abraham.
ReplyDeleteWill.
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